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安妮日记-第72章

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sunday morning; just before eleven。

yours; anne 

m。 frank

monday; april 17; 1944

dearest kitty;

do you think father and mother would approve of a girl my age sitting on a divan and kissing a seventeen…and… a…half…year…old boy? i doubt they would; but i have to trust my own judgment in this matter。 its so peaceful and safe; lying in his arms and dreaming; its so thrilling to feel his cheek against mine; its so wonderful to know theres someone waiting for me。 but; and there is a but; will peter want to leave it at that? i havent forgotten his promise; but。 。 。 he is a boy!

i know im starting at a very young age。 not even fifteen and already so independent …… thats a little hard for other people to understand。 im pretty sure margot would never kiss a boy unless there was some talk of an engagement or marriage。 neither peter nor i has any such plans。 im also sure that mother never touched a man before she met father。 what would my girlfriends or jacque say if they knew id lain in peters arms with my heart against his chest; my head on his shoulder and his head and face against mine!

oh; anne; how terribly shocking! but seriously; i dont think its at all shocking; were cooped up here; cut off from the world; anxious and fearful; especially lately。 why should we stay apart when we love each other? why shouldnt we kiss each other in times like these? why should we wait until weve reached a suitable age? why should we ask anybodys permission?

ive decided to look out for my own interests。 hed never want to hurt me or make me unhappy。 why shouldnt i do what my heart tells me and makes both of us happy?

yet i have a feeling; kitty; that you can sense my doubt。 it must be my honesty rising in revolt against all this sneaking around。 do you think its my duty to tell father what im up to? do you think our secret should be shared with a third person?

much of the beauty would be lost; but would it make me feel better inside? ill bring it up with him。

oh; yes; i still have so much i want to discuss with him; since i dont see the point of just cuddling。 sharing our thoughts with each other requires a great deal of trust; but well both be stronger because of it!

yours; anne 

m。 frank

p。s。 we were up at six yesterday morning; because the whole family heard the sounds of a break…in again。 it must have been one of our neighbors who was the victim this

time。 when we checked at seven oclock; our doors were still shut tight; thank goodness!

tuesday; april 18;1944

dearest kitty;

everythings fine here。 last night the carpenter came again to put some sheets of iron over the door panels。 father just got through saying he definitely expects large…scale operations in russia and italy; as well as in the west; before may 20; the longer the war lasts; the harder it is to imagine being liberated from this place。

yesterday peter and i finally got around to having the talk weve been postponing for the last ten days。 i told him all about girls; without hesitating to discuss the most intimate matters。 i found it rather amusing that he thought the opening in a womans body was simply left out of illustrations。 he couldnt imagine that it was actually located between a womans legs。 the evening ended with a mutual kiss; near the mouth。 its really a lovely feeling!

i might take my 〃favorite quotes notebook〃 up with me sometime so peter and i can go more deeply into matters。 i dont think lying in each others arms day in and day out is very satisfying; and i hope he feels the same。

after our mild winter weve been having a beautiful spring。 april is glorious; not too hot and not too cold; with occasional light showers。 our chestnut tree is in leaf; and here and there you can already see a few small blossoms。

bep presented us saturday with four bouquets of flowers: three bouquets of daffodils; and one bouquet of grape hyacinths for me。 mr。 kugler is supplying us with more and more newspapers。

its time to do my algebra; kitty。 bye。

yours; anne 

m。 frank

wednesday; april 19; 1944

dearest darling; (thats the title of a movie with dorit kreysler; ida wust and harald paulsen!)

what could be nicer than sitting before an open window; enjoying nature; listening to the birds sing; feeling the sun on your cheeks and holding a darling boy in your arms?

i feel so peaceful and safe with his arm around me; knowing hes near and yet not having to speak; how can this be bad when it does me so much good? oh; if only we were never disturbed again; not even by mouschi。

yours; anne 

m。 frank

friday; april 21;1944

my dearest kitty;

i stayed in bed yesterday with a sore throat; but since i was already bored the very first afternoon and didnt have a fever; i got up today。 my sore throat has nearly 〃verschwunden〃 ' disappeared'。

yesterday; as youve probably already discovered; was our fiihrers fifty…fifth birthday。 today is the eighteenth birthday of her royal highness princess elizabeth of york。 the bbc reported that she hasnt yet been declared of age; though royal children usually are。 weve been wondering which prince theyll marry this beauty off to; but cant think of a suitable candidate; perhaps her sister; princess margaret rose; can have crown prince baudouin of belgium!

here weve been going from one disaster to the next。 no sooner have the outside doors been reinforced than van maaren rears his head again。 in all likelihood hes the one who stole the potato flour; and now hes trying to pin the blame on bep。 not surprisingly; the annex is once again in an uproar。 bep is beside herself with rage。

perhaps mr。 kugler will finally have this shady character tailed。

the appraiser from beethovenstraat was here this morning。 he offered us 400 guilders for our chest; in our opinion; the other estimates are also too low。

i want to ask the magazine the prince if theyll take one of my fairy tales; under a pseudonym; of course。 but up to now all my fairy tales have been too long; so i dont think i have much of a chance。

until the next time; darling。

yours; anne 

m。 frank

tuesday; april 25; 1944

dearest kitty;

for the last ten days dussel hasnt been on speaking terms with m
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