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道林格雷的画像-第8章

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 like sunlight; or spring…time; or the reflection in dark waters of that silver shell we call the moon。 it cannot be questioned。 it has its divine right of sovereignty。 it makes princes of those who have it。 you smile? ah! when you have lost it you wont smile。 。 。 。 people say sometimes that beauty is only superficial。 that may be so; but at least it is not so superficial as thought is。 to me; beauty is the wonder of wonders。 it is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances。 the true mystery of the world is the visible; not the invisible。 。 。 。 yes; mr。 gray; the gods have been good to you。 but what the gods give they quickly take away。 you have only a few years in which to live really; perfectly; and fully。 when your youth goes; your beauty will go with it; and then you will suddenly discover that there are no triumphs left for you; or have to content yourself with those mean triumphs that the memory of your past will make more bitter than defeats。 every month as it wanes brings you nearer to something dreadful。 time is jealous of you; and wars against your lilies and your roses。 you will bee sallow; and hollow…cheeked; and dull…eyed。 you will suffer horribly。。。。 ah! realize your youth while you have it。 dont squander the gold of your days; listening to the tedious; trying to improve the hopeless failure; or giving away your life to the ignorant; the mon; and the vulgar。 these are the sickly aims; the false ideals; of our age。 live! live the wonderful life that is in you! let nothing be lost upon you。 be always searching for new sensations。 be afraid of nothing。 。 。 。 a new hedonism…… that is what our century wants。 you might be its visible symbol。 with your personality there is nothing you could not do。 the world belongs to you for a season。 。 。 。 the moment i met you i saw that you were quite unconscious of what you really are; of what you really might be。 there was so much in you that charmed me that i felt i must tell you something about yourself。 i thought how tragic it would be if you were wasted。 for there is such a little time that your youth will last……such a little time。 the mon hill…flowers wither; but they blossom again。 the laburnum will be as yellow next june as it is now。 in a month there will be purple stars on the clematis; and year after year the green night of its leaves will hold its purple stars。 but we never get back our youth。 the pulse of joy that beats in us at twenty bees sluggish。 our limbs fail; our senses rot。 we degenerate into hideous puppets; haunted by the memory of the passions of which we were too much afraid; and the exquisite temptations that we had not the courage to yield to。 youth! youth! there is absolutely nothing in the world but youth!〃

dorian gray listened; open…eyed and wondering。 the spray of lilac fell from his hand upon the gravel。 a furry bee came and buzzed round it for a moment。 then it began to scramble all over the oval stellated globe of the tiny blossoms。 he watched it with that strange interest in trivial things that we try to develop when things of high import make us afraid; or when we are stirred by some new emotion for which we cannot find expression; or when some thought that terrifies us lays sudden siege to the brain and calls on us to yield。 after a time the bee flew away。 he saw it creeping into the stained trumpet of a tyrian convolvulus。 the flower seemed to quiver; and then swayed gently to and fro。

suddenly the painter appeared at the door of the studio and made staccato signs for them to e in。 they turned to each other and smiled。

〃i am waiting;〃 he cried。 〃do e in。 the light is quite perfect; and you can bring your drinks。〃

they rose up and sauntered down the walk together。 two green…and…white butterflies fluttered past them; and in the pear…tree at the corner of the garden a thrush began to sing。

〃you are glad you have met me; mr。 gray;〃 said lord henry; looking at him。

〃yes; i am glad now。 i wonder shall i always be glad?〃

〃always! that is a dreadful word。 it makes me shudder when i hear it。 women are so fond of using it。 they spoil every romance by trying to make it last for ever。 it is a meaningless word; too。 the only difference between a caprice and a lifelong passion is that the caprice lasts a little longer。〃

as they entered the studio; dorian gray put his hand upon lord henrys arm。 〃in that case; let our friendship be a caprice;〃 he murmured; flushing at his own boldness; then stepped up on the platform and resumed his pose。

lord henry flung himself into a large wicker arm…chair and watched him。 the sweep and dash of the brush on the canvas made the only sound that broke the stillness; except when; now and then; hallward stepped back to look at his work from a distance。 in the slanting beams that streamed through the open doorway the dust danced and was golden。 the heavy scent of the roses seemed to brood over everything。

after about a quarter of an hour hallward stopped painting; looked for a long time at dorian gray; and then for a long time at the picture; biting the end of one of his huge brushes and frowning。 〃it is quite finished;〃 he cried at last; and stooping down he wrote his name in long vermilion letters on the left…hand corner of the canvas。

lord henry came over and examined the picture。 it was certainly a wonderful work of art; and a wonderful likeness as well。

〃my dear fellow; i congratulate you most warmly;〃 he said。 〃it is the finest portrait of modern times。 mr。 gray; e over and look at yourself。〃

the lad started; as if awakened from some dream。

〃is it really finished?〃 he murmured; stepping down from the platform。

〃quite finished;〃 said the painter。 〃and you have sat splendidly to…day。 i am awfully obliged to you。〃

〃that is entirely due to me;〃 broke in lord henry。 〃isnt it; mr。 gray?〃

dorian made no answer; but passed listlessly in front of his picture and turned towards it。 when he saw it he drew back; and his cheeks flushed for a moment with pleasure。 a look of joy came into his eyes; as if he had recognized himself for the first time。 he stood there motionless and in wonder; dimly conscious that hallward was speaking to him; but not catching the meaning of his word
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